I hope I don’t offend anyone..but as someone actively searching for a dog, I feel like I have a better appreciation for what it’s like to be a single woman in the dating world; and let me tell you– it’s ruff, ruff, ruff.

It’s a sniff and dig, in and out, up and down, run and jump agility course of endless hoops, obstacles, comparisons, examination and doubt.  One minute you’re on the scent of a juicy “keeper,” the next minute you’re all chewed up sulking in your bed.

Looking for an actual dog ain’t much better.

A few years ago, there was a fella on E-harmony who was perfect; on paper. He checked off all the boxes in every category..personality, self discipline, pedigree, manners and yet my daughter felt no physical attraction.. no “spark.”  She asked me if the spark  was necessary for her to continue on with the budding relationship- I said “yes, it is.”

I remembered my own advice as I sat staring into the round, black button eyes of a friendly little mutt a few days ago.  His temperament was perfect, he was well behaved, he literally was everything I thought I wanted.. thought I needed.. but there was no spark between us.  His hair was coarse, and I’m a super snuggler, so I tend to fall for softies..

Was that it?

Did it all come down to bad hair?

(Am I that shallow?)

All I know is the weeks long, drawn-out procedure from start (seeing his picture on Petfinder) to finish (telling the foster mom that he wasn’t my guy) was exhausting. I thought back to my terrible experience at a Pet Smart adoption event a few months ago and that chaotic “speed-dating” session definitely wasn’t any better, so what to do??

Is it possible to organically “run into” my perfect sidekick just minding my own business sitting on a park bench?  My daughters tell me “no, it’s not.” It certainly hasn’t happened to them.

The most interesting part of all of this is the endless introspection that occurs when there’s no match. I fall into this serious period of deep questioning that always seems to conclude with the idea that surely there’s something wrong with me; my standards are simply too high, maybe I’m too selfish with my time, maybe I’m afraid of commitment, maybe I’m just trying to replace the best dog I ever had, (maybe he wasn’t as great as I remember) heck maybe I don’t really want to share my life after all, maybe I’m just fine without a companion, maybe I simply have NO HEART   …blah, blah, blah.

The process just sucks.  You think it’s gonna be like this:

But it’s really more like this..

There has got to be a better way!