“What was dad like on your first date, mom?” my daughter asked as I dumped the pot of hot spaghetti into the strainer over the sink. I stood still for a minute, phone pressed against my neck trying to remember as the fog slowly lifted off my bifocals.
“I think we played raquetball and then probably took a stroll around the Academy,” I answered plumbing the depths of my memory.. “not sure if we went out to eat or not, but knowing dad we probably grabbed something downtown.” A quick shake of the colander released a new waft of warm steam.. ” I just remember it was fun” I added “dad was a lot of fun.”
Thanks to some well-meaning friends, my 25 year old daughter has gone on a few, basically blind, first dates lately that have left her feeling as if there’s something wrong with her. They will go out to dinner or the movies, have some light, explorative conversation and then whamo -these guys are instantly all touchy-feely.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like they are rushing for second base or anything (not that I even remember what the bases are) but seriously, if you meet someone for the first time ever in your life at 6pm, does it seem right to expect the girl to be comfortable holding hands with you on a walk at 7:45?
I’m not saying the guys are aggressive, but it’s as if they are following some dating-manual rather than taking their cues from the girl they are with. Call me old fashioned, but holding hands on a walk is way more intimate than a quick end-of-date little kiss.
What on earth is the rush there fellas? Ever heard of a second date?
Which is of course (sadly) not going to happen with this most recent guy …and not because there’s anything “wrong” with my daughter.